YOU CAN HARVEST "MOI", BUT NOT "ME", FROM THE INTERNET!

I'm forced to address a certain confluence of factors, to wit: Apparently, some folks from my past -- long-ago past -- have discovered me courtesy of internet searches. You all should keep something in mind: this blog is about "Moi", which is not exactly the same thing as "me". Don't believe everything you read about me, whether on moi blogs or elsewhere in the internet. (And for those people who talk about me, claiming they know me, just use this rule of thumb -- if they haven't seen me in a year, let alone a month, they don't know me, okay?)

And now, I must release Moi to blog about something "I" know nothing about:

                  GARDENING

I can't tell you how much I relish the news that Gura Michelle considers my harvest of 20 strawberries, to date, to be a bounty. This is Gura who has managed to harvest ... 2 strawberries! COUNT THEM!

Made my day, but it still doesn't ease moi misery. Because, you see, those 20 strawberries are also ... teeny. The majority aren't any larger than my little finger's fingernail!

Since I had big, burly men build a big, burly rock-wall garden for moi attempt to be Martha Stewart, I should note that these almost-invisible strawberries are not only ... almost-invisible but, on a per-chew basis, the most expensive strawberries I have ever relished. Even more than the individual strawberry wrapped in tissue paper that I once bought in Tokyo for $9.50 (in 1980s dollars).

I should note further that there's nearly 20 varieties of vegetables in the garden, so the fact that I'm counting only 20 strawberries to date is particularly paltry.

But I am making progress! I am purrrr-ed to announce that, yesterday, this City Slicker harvested 209 basil leaves (shut up you people who know that basil grows like a weed and the fact that I can manage to count the leaves I harvest imply something about how the bounty isn't as bountiful as normal).

Then, inspired by Leny -- who watches snails mating among her strawberries! Hm: must be viscuous -- who has tried in the past to have me rediscover the indigenous Pinay soul who can cook, I made pesto! I had a fabulous pesto pasta for dinner and it was yum yum bam bam (geez: who talks like that!)! This pesto recipe is now on moi's I-phone.

I rock.

I mean:

Moi rocks!